All posts by Dating Guru

What To Do When Your Date Doesn’t Call After Saying He Will

Dating is stressful affairs. While dating, one of the major mishaps a lot of women face and struggle with is, when a guy promises to call them, but doesn’t. Read on to find out more how you can handle such a crisis if you happen to be one of them.

Don’t be Scared

If you've met someone you like, it's natural you want to see that person again. Heck, you may be even daydreaming about him or imagining your future with him! For these reasons, you can be hit really hard if he doesn’t call you. Whenever this happens, don’t panic. Don’t let your anxiety overwhelm you.

Don't Beat Yourself Up

Your beliefs are connected to your feelings. In other words, negative thinking will result in negative feelings. Ask yourself what didn’t he call back? Is it because you are destined for fall in love? Is it that you’re unlucky when it comes to relationships? Is it because you’re unattractive, so no one wants to be your boyfriend? Try to find out what are your beliefs regarding the above questions and why he hasn’t called back. Now, ask yourself whether those negative thoughts are the reason you’ve bad feelings. If you learned that these negative thoughts are having an adverse impact on you, you should immediately stop thinking about those thoughts, and replace them with positive feelings and thoughts instead. This way you’ll better about yourself and see things in much broader perspective.

Don’t Jump to Conclusions

Dating is risky business as there’s always the chance of someone getting hurt. If you’re going to date or have a relationship, you need to accept that there are many variable elements at work, when two people get attracted to each other and start a relationship. Readiness, time, luck all plays a vital role. So, keep that in mind when you’re looking for a partner. Also remember that jumping to conclusions will maintain the focus on him, which gives him a lot of power to your emotional needs. So, shift the focus to yourself and your feelings. The way you respond when a guy hasn’t called you isn’t a reflection on him; it’s about yourself.

Focus your mental energy on something more productive

We understand that it feels bad when a guy doesn’t call, but instead of holding a grudge against him won’t make him call you. Rather, focus all your mental energy on something more productive and positive that will distract you from thinking about him. Go for a walk, hang out with a friend or work on that project you didn’t have time for and so on.

Start looking for another man

Wait for two days or up to a week for him to call back. If he hasn’t called by then, look for someone new. This the right time to respond to other guys emails online, or hang out with your girlfriends at a party or bar where you can meet someone new. If you failed there, go to another place or even a new city or two. Eventually, you’ll find someone who wants to date you the way you are.

<Overall, if you’re looking for love, remember that there are plenty of fish in the sea. There are many girls and guys out there, and you’ll find someone right for you. So, follow these tips and stay hopeful and positive.

Three Ways To Know If You’re Dating a Good Person

If you meet a new guy, it’s pretty hard to tell if he is really a great man, even after going on a few dates with him. Some guys are genuinely good people, while there are some or are just acting until he exposes who he really is.

So, how can you find out if the man you’re dating is right to be in a relationship with you? Women like to date guys who are kind, honest and committed. If a man has all three good traits, he will be successful in the three factors we discussed below. Here are three ways to know:

Work History

One of the most critical factors in accessing the character and quality of a man is by analyzing his work history. If you want a stable and drama free romantic relationship with a guy, then date a man who has a job, loves it, and knows how to hold on to it. A man, who has a stable job, will also be stable in a relationship. Some men may be out of jobs, because of the economy or due to the unstable job market, so don’t hold it against them. The key here you need date men who are in jobs and even if they aren’t into one, dating one who is persistent in finding one. However, don’t ask a guy what kind of job he does for a living. Most men hate this type of questions because they fear that women might reject them if they find out how much money they earn. Instead, ask them what does he do for a living, and if he likes it, and whether he prefers to do it in the long-term.

Relationship With His Family Members

Most people assume that if a man has good relations with his family members, he is a good person. But, what if he decides to get detached from them for his own well-being because his parents and siblings are on the crazy side? The thing is family dynamics are private and complicated issues. So don’t pass judgment on guy quickly by the relationship he maintains with his kith and kin. Instead, try to get to know more about him and his family by asking what kind relationship does he have with parents, does he see them often, how well do you get with your brothers and sisters, etc. If he responds positively to these questions, it means that he care about his parents and siblings, and doing his best to improve the relationship with them. Nonetheless, it is hard to find out if a man is good on not, by looking at his family.

Relationships With His Friends

You can know a lot about a person by looking at his friends, the relationship he maintains with them, and the kinds of activities he engages in with his buddies. To find out more ask your man how often does he hangs out with his friends, does he play sports with them, does he have a best friend from school, etc. A good guy will at least have one best friend or a few close friends from high school and he will be committed, caring and loyal to them. However, if your date has friends, you don’t like, consider terminating the relationship.

If you’re dating a woman or man, finding out whether they're good people or not, is a daunting task and takes time. But, by focusing on his work history, relationships with his family, and relationships he maintains with his friends, you can make it less complicated.

Three Big Things That Are Major Turnoffs for Men

When it comes to men there are some things women can do to turn on and turn off – men they’re interested in. Most men are looking for companionship and love from the women they love. So, the key to making you love and adore is to understand them better, so both of you can have a happy and lasting relationship.

Turnoff # 1: Expecting your man to pay for everything

Do you think it’s reasonable for a man to foot the bill on your first date? Did you ever wonder how it will be if both of you split the bill? Often, most men pay for the first date, and some are even happy to pay for it. Meanwhile, there are some who think that why should they pay for the whole thing, when his date is capable of paying for herself. It can make some men resentful that women have turned them into financial providers automatically, even though they can hardly remember each other’s full names. Always offer to pay yourself on a date. Most men are happy to pay while on a date with a woman, but he will appreciate you if you split the bill.

Turnoff # 2: Discussing love, marriage, and children way too soon

We get it when women can resist the urge to tell a man that they’ve just started dating that they want to get married, have kids, start a family and so on. But, what most women forget that this type of life plans can overwhelm a man. Men get turned off if they assume that you’re desperate to get married and have children. Just like women, men too would like to know more about you and trust you, before they’re interested in talking about your plans. To make this right, it okay to the first date if you tell a man that you’re looking for a relationship. But wait for few weeks to tell about your future life plans like marriage, kids, etc.

Turnoff # 3: Teasing men to get intimate with women

Traditional stereotypes say that men crave sex more than women. But this isn’t true always. While dating, men normally get frustrated, feeling that the woman they’re dating doesn't want to have sex with them. It’s not that women are disinterested in sex, but women enjoy playing games to get and make their man work for it. It is a total turn off for most men and makes them lose interest in the woman they’re dating. It's because they think that women are using sex – something like a finishing move. To make this right, tell your guy that you want to wait for sex and say why. It's fine for you to tell your man you're dating that you don’t get physically intimate so soon.

Overall, most guys are looking for love and companionship in a relationship. Also, they’re also looking for someone who cares and pay attention to their thoughts and feelings. If a man is interested in you, he’ll understand your desire for sex and know how to attract you. Remember the above turnoffs when you're on a date with a man and see how your date turns into a successful relationship!

Four Tips To Reduce Anxiety On First Dates

Dating is stressful, no doubt about it. Most men and women get really anxious on their first dates because it’s all unknown and no one knows what’s going to happen. All these stress and anxiety will put you in the wrong mood to meet someone new. The best way to confront your anxiety is to relax and be confident, so don’t get overly anxious before meeting your date. Here are four tips that can be helpful to reduce anxiety on your first date. Read on to find more:

1. Make a list of your Deals and Deal Breakers. Being organized both in body and mind is one of best approaches to reducing anxiety. Writing down your thoughts is great to get you organized. Make a list of all the good traits and deal breakers you want to see in your future partner. It can include needs to have a job, should be interested to know more about me, should have similar views and interests, etc. Now, write down all the deal breakers like, no drugs, no bad temper, should drink too much, and so on. Everyone has his or her preferences and deal breakers, so it’s important to ask yourself what you really need to be happy in a relationship.

2. Use positive self-talk. Stand in front of a mirror and speak to yourself, things you did and their results that happened to you throughout the day. It can be good or bad. Is your self-talk having a positive or adverse effect on you? Speaking to yourself in a positive tone is good for you and will make you more confident before and after your first date.

3. Focus on the date itself. Focus on the date itself, not at the person you’ll be meeting. It’s perfectly fine to think about your date is going to be like and what did you expect from it. If you’re both interested, you can hope for to have a stable relationship. But, things always don’t end as we want to it to be. It’s better to hope that you meet someone you’ll like, but also be prepared for the prospect that you two won’t be perfect for each other at the same time. One way to get stop yourself from overthinking is mainly focused on the dating activity, rather who you’ll be engaging to in the date. For example, think about the things and activities you enjoy and like to do, places you like visiting for vacations, and talk about some of them with your date.

4. Ask your best friend for support and vent out your feelings. When you feel insecure and nervous ask your close friends for support. If you get anxious, tell them that you’re losing your mind, ask them to give five or ten minutes of a pep talk. Take a few deep breath, and vent out your feelings loudly. If your scream out all of your negative feelings and energy, you will bounce back to your old self and feel focused within a few minutes. Always remind yourself that dating can be fun and enjoyable if you don’t feel stressed out.

Finally, there are plenty of ways to help you minimize your anxiety on the first date. Whether you’re meeting a woman or man for the first time, keeping your anxiety in check is important, because when you’re relaxed, you’re at your best, confident, and attractive to you date.

Is Dating Someone New A Good Approach To Get Over Your Ex?

So you’ve just ended your relationship with your partner, and thinking what are you going to do next? Will you wait to get over your ex and will you find someone new and begin a new relationship ASAP? Some men and women believe that if they start dating again after breaking up, it will help them get over their pain quickly. But is it a good step? Read on to find out:

Merits of dating someone new right away

1. It keeps your distracted and stops you from thinking about your ex all the time. Dating someone new is the best way to do it.

2. It’s fun and exciting to get into dating again. Meeting, flirting and mingling with new people will boost your confidence and ego. Getting attention from the opposite sex will hone your flirting skills too. Also, meeting new folks will enrich your life.

Demerits of dating someone new right away

1. You risk repeating the same mistakes again. You won't learn from your past mistakes, if you rush into a new relationship soon after a breakup. If you don’t think about the mistakes which lead to the demise of your previous relationship, you risk repeating the same mistakes all over again. Also, if you rush into a new relationship, there is a chance you will dating someone who isn’t right for you. Instead, think what worked and what didn’t and what can you learn from it, so that you can have a much healthier relationship and everlasting love the next time.

2. You won’t have a chance to grieve for your past relationship. You should acknowledge the loss of a relationship. When you rush into a new relationship as soon as you ended things, it appears like the breakup is nothing to you. Concealing your feelings and never talking about them isn’t healthy. You’ll feel better and less burdened if you grief over your failed relationship or marriage. We understand it’s sad and not fun, but it definitely one of the best ways to help you get over your past relationship and your ex and move on.

3. You won’t have time to build up your self-esteem and confidence. When you’re meeting someone new, you want to feel good and confident. If you’ve broken up recently, this won’t be possible. Getting over your ex after a breakup takes time. If you really want to rebuild your self-esteem and confidence, we suggest you follow your interests and passion and do things you always wanted to do. Go hiking, take a vacation, get that promotion, lose some weight, change your lifestyle, etc. This way, you will feel confident and be ready to meet new singles.

Breakups aren’t easy. Getting over your ex takes time. It doesn’t happen overnight. Also, you shouldn’t have a relationship with someone who isn’t right for you, just because you hate being alone. The demise of a relationship makes us angry, pained, depressed, frustrated and resentful to our exes. But, it’s also an opportunity to learn something new, and avoid the mistakes that you won’t repeat in your next relationship. Hoping into a new relationship immediately after a breakup won’t help you do it. Perhaps, take your time and prepare yourself to know how to impress a girl to be your girlfriend.

How to Know When You’re Ready to Be In an ACTUAL Relationship

To all singles out there – you think you’re ready to be in a relationship? Before you say, first check in with yourself and determine if you’re really are willing to commit to a relationship. You may tell yourself that you’re ready and all set to settle down with someone, but in fact, it’s your behavior you’ve to look at first. There are many men and women you claim that they’re ready to start a relationship, but in reality, their behaviors tell otherwise. So, it’s your behavior that will tell you if you’re ready to begin a relationship, not what you think or say.

When you’re ready to have an adult reowlationship, your behavior will reflect if you’re ready for such kind of long-term commitment. Read on to find out what you need for being ready for a relationship.

1. Your impulsive behavior is misaligned with your actions and feelings. When you go out with your friends, you tend to over drink. When you’re bored, you visit a bar or a nightclub. We aren’t telling you that drinking or going to a nightclub is detrimental to be in a good relationship or find one. The main thing is about how your act and feel when you’re there or in a situation which indicates whether you’re ready to begin a relationship. If you get drunk every time you get depressed or visit a bar, it points that you aren’t in a position to have a healthy relationship. Sure, you’ll meet someone, but you’ll not be at your best. Eventually, you’ll see yourself having a relationship with someone not right for you. It is okay to you meet someone you like and start having a relationship with him or her. But, at first introduce yourself to them, know them, and make plans to see them in another environment.

2. You think about why your past relationships failed. It’s futile to sulk why your previous relationships didn’t last. It takes two people to screw a relationship, so it’s better you stop blaming your ex for the demise of your relationship. When you’re ready to be in a new relationship, take a look back at your past relationship, and analyze what parts of the relationship that were counterproductive and unhealthy. Try to figure out the process of not seeing these behaviors in your current relationship.

3. You got rid of all the drama. Now, that you’ve come in terms why your past relationships ended, you can now confidently say that you got rid of the drama associated with dysfunctional relationships. You’re no longer interested with your friends exploits when they had problems in their relationship such as silly make-up sex, getting back together with your ex after a few months apart and so on. You feel more mature, calm, confident and fully ready to start an adult relationship.

The bottom line is, when you think you’re ready to love someone and start a relationship, then look at your behavior, if you’re really ready for it. The only way you can have and maintain a loving, long-lasting relationship is starting it on a solid foundation. And that can only happen if you two are emotionally connected.

The Five Worst Ways to Get Dumped By Your Partner

Breaking up is never easy. Breakups are one of the worse things to happen while being in a relationship. Sometimes we think the mental pain and emotional distress that we experience while breaking up with someone or getting dumped is more that hopelessness and depression we face when we single. Most men and women think that while getting dumped or breaking up, the receiver gets more pain than the one who dismisses the relationship. But, that’s not true, and it’s painful on both sides. Even worse, the person who breaks up with someone has to live with the guilt and it can be very hard to deal.

However, compassion is the key if you want to minimize the guilt, pain, anger and resentment on both sides, if you’ve decided to end the relationship. Here are five ways you should never think of doing when ending a relationship:

1. Telling someone else to do it. Some folks ask their friends to this unholy task for them. Asking somebody else to break up with your partner isn’t only cowardly; it’s disrespectful to the receiver. Do it yourself and be prepared for the backlash that follows it – like a mature man.

2. Breaking up with a text message. It’s a lovely gesture to cute texts like, ‘I love you,' ‘Missing you,' etc. But, it’s whole different thing when you text your significant other saying that ‘We can’t see or be with each other anymore.' It is cruel and regretful. If you’ve decided to end the relationship with him or her, take a deep breath, man up, pick up the phone and call him or her instead.

3. The sticky note. This one is similar to breaking up with someone you love over a text message, except this time you are using a sticky note, instead of a cell phone. Writing a small note on a piece of a yellow paper and placing it on your partner‘s television o fridge, saying, ‘We can’t see or be with each other anymore,' is one of the worst and cowardly acts you can do. Have some integrity for yourself, and do it yourself. Don’t let a piece of yellow paper do it for you.

4. Breaking up on Facebook. Most men and women want to see an adorable and affectionate message by their girlfriend or boyfriends on their Facebook wall. But, breaking up with your partner on by posting a breakup message on his or her Facebook wall is something most will never get over. Even worse, if your friends or other people ‘liking’ it!

5. Getting disappeared. Getting disappeared or lost and not having a conversation with your significant other might be the worst way to end a relationship. Period. Breaking up with somebody you had a relationship with, is totally unacceptable. Face your fears, be courageous, be humble and break up with some compassion.

The takeaway from this discussion makes people understand it’s wrong and unacceptable to break up with your girlfriend or boyfriend in the following ways. Have some compassion, dignity, courage and empathy to break up with someone and face it like a man! Make your choice rightfully, unless you really in love after months and want your ex back.

Four Relationship Habits That Keep You Away From Long Term Success

Apparently, there aren’t any bad behaviors that keep someone away from being in a relationship. Usually, it’s an idealized perception of relationships that makes it a fantasy dream that never comes true. And it’s the unwillingness to get out from that fantasy land that is what keeps them people single.

But, some relationship experts refute it. Below are four relationship behaviors that might keep some men and women without any partners. Read on to find out:

1. You Are Invasive. Are you persistently asked by people to keep your voice down or give somebody else a chance to speak? Did you find yourself in situations where you’re trying to connect to individuals in spite of seeing them busy and unwilling to talk to you? Do people criticize of being nosey or invading their private space deliberately? If you find it hard respecting other people’s personal space, then it’s a bad habit. Keep in mind that no man or woman wants to be coerced into making a connection with someone else. Try to be more mindful.

2. You Are Impulsive. Do you lose control when something goes wrong? Are you the kind of person who acts first and think later? Do you get angry or paranoid easily? If you’re quick to react to anything without thinking about the outcome, then you’re jeopardizing your opportunity to cultivate emotional connection and security in a loving, healthy relationship. Being impulsive is harmful to both men and women, and no one likes to date a person who has a thin skin. Before you attack, argue or insult someone, take a few deep breaths, and try to analyze the situation and its possible outcomes. Try to ignore the voices in your head that are hyper-sensitive to other people’s motives.

3. You Are Impatient. Do you dislike people who make you wait? Are you selfish with your time? Are you someone who often interrupts people when they talk? Do you get nervous and aggressive when someone is late to meet you? Do you find it hard to relax during physical intimacy? Impatience is one of the negative traits that can make you unpopular with both men and women. Everyone has his or her speed or pace in doing things. Try not to get angry or anxious when if your date is late to meet you, or takes a long time to tell her story, takes some time to get ready or walks slowly than you. Try to honor their pace, and they’ll honor yours.

4. You Are Too Helpful. This one is for the ladies. Did you ever rush to the fridge and cook something for your man? Being helpful and attentive is fine, overdoing it annoying. For starters, why don’t you let your guy walk to the refrigerator, and take out and cook something for himself just for the experience? Always attending to every demand of your husband or boyfriend makes you appear needy, desperate and insecure. If a man loves you, they’ll be more than happy to do things for themselves and actually prefer it that way. If he wants something they like you to do or need some help, they will ask.

Whether you’re looking for someone or trying to reconcile with your ex, if you can keep yourself from these four habits, there is a better chance for you to be in a healthy and everlasting relationship.

Are First Dates Like Job Interviews?

Before we tell you if first dates are like job interviews, let us talk about speed dating events to get a perspective on the subject, and it isn’t pretty for the most part. When it comes to speed dating, when two people meet with their potential partners, a lot of normal behavior and reasoning goes out of the door. We only want to impress and get impressed. What we tend to forget is that connecting with someone gets complicated, when dating becomes a competition. In reality, most of us get more self-conscious and critical than we normally are.

These days first dates are more like interviewing for good jobs. We sell ourselves to get what we really want. At most speed, dating event men are more like potential candidates all prepped up with their resumes and accomplishments, while the women act like interviewers. If a woman isn’t happy or impressed by a man, they pass him up for a new guy, without even trying to engage or know him better.

It’s not surprising that most men and women feel dejected and disillusioned by the whole thing, as no one is trying to connect to each other personally. All they want to compete, impress, show off in their quest to find the perfect partner for their lives. However, this scenario isn’t only confined to speed dating events. You can see the same thing getting repeated in online dating as well. Often on most first dates, we either too hard to sell or judge our potential suitors too quickly. This habit hasn’t yielded us anything positive. But, that’s not the real problem. The real issue is we have the entire whole dating process all wrong.

So, we need to try a new tactic. Whenever you’re in a hurry to choose your partner, it prevents you from connecting to them on an emotional level. It’s highly likely that a lot of ladies dismissed some great guys because they misinterpreted something they said or thought that they were too anxious or nervous, or only found a reason that won’t work. Rather of investigating to find out what’s wrong, you need to be in the present and simply enjoy and cherish the moment. The similar tactic also applies to people who are trying too hard to impress other. How can you think of someone to have a connection with your date, when all you’re doing is convincing him or her to like you?

Well, you can do something different. Try to engage with someone without thinking whether if he is someone I can have a relationship with in the future. If you liked him, you didn’t try too hard to get his attention and on yourself. Eventually, you’ll realize that the whole dating things have become interesting and, of course, even fun.

Every person has a story to tell. If you date a woman for the first time and she doesn’t click with you straight away, don’t get discouraged. Instead, try to enjoy the dating experience and the moment. Try to get to know more about the person, instead of selling yourself or deciding immediately if he or she is compatible with you. Remember, you aren’t looking for a job here, you looking for a connection here with your potential partner. So, don’t rush, have fun and hope for the best.

Five Online Dating Safety Tips Every Woman Should Know

Getting to know and meeting new people online has become so easy that most people particularly women all often put their guards down, forget their common sense and expose their vulnerabilities to a complete stranger. Just because you read someone’s profile, liked it, and then met at the bar, people think they know each other and felt comfortable.

Men who are good at commuting and can connect emotionally to women can be one of the most harmful of daters. Women instantly feel a spiritual connection and instant chemistry to these types of men. Many ladies say that the guy they just met online is safe and okay, but are they? You can never know when something can go wrong and you’ve lived with consequences for the rest of your life. So, it’s better to be safe than sorry.

Here are some safety tips every woman should abide while dating online.

1. Meet your date in a public place. Start with a restaurant or coffee shop. These places have enough people and can be witnesses in case things go awry. Never meet your date at a secluded place or in his apartment or home, until you’ve been dating him for several weeks.

2. Inform a friend or family member about your date, where you’ll be meeting, and other relevant details like name, cell phone number, address and so on. At the date call a friend or family member or ask your friend to call you and let them know how the date is progressing. Also, you can also use this trick to excuse yourself in case your date isn’t going well and want to end the date soon.

3. Drive yourself to the date and return home driving yourself. Having your own transportation gives you freedom if the date goes bad. Being reliant on someone else for transportation is the worst thing ever like If gives them control how long should the date last. After all, having your own car is just safer.

4. Don’t drink too much. Getting drunk during a date creates bad judgment, and there are many guys out there who are willing to take advantage of you. So, stay sober.

5. Don’t always trust your instincts. We aren’t saying that men are bad, but there are guys out there who think and act differently than what most guys will do. These guys will try to take advantage of a woman who is single and looking for someone to have a relationship. Sometimes our conscience and intuition can become blurred by the chemistry or the connection we feel when we feel attracted to someone as if like we’ve known them for many years. Our common sense gets thrown out of the window, and we act and believe everything that our inner voice tells us to do. Safety should be first and even more when it comes to dating online. Being safe is a thousand times better that trusting your instincts with someone we never met in person, no matter how much we know about them from our online conversations.

So there you have it, some straightforward and quick tips on how to be safe while meeting someone new for the first time online. Happy dating!